Brainstorming for anniversaries has become an increasingly challenging task, partly due to the pandemic and partly due to the diminishing level of creativity if you as a couple have been together for a while... Having had, let’s just say, multiple instances of divergent opinions on “what to expect on anniversaries (or birthdays, Valentine’s day, Christmas - you name it)”, Blowfish and I had a serious conversation a while ago to make sure we would (hopefully) be aligned in the future on that topic. I don’t recall exactly how that conversation went, but two key takeaways were here to stay: 1) we would celebrate it; and 2) experience-based celebration is preferred to gift-based celebration.
Three weeks ago, it was our 10-year dating anniversary. Although I secretly question the seeming significance of the number 10 (or any multiples of 5 really) over 9 or 12, I don’t miss out on any celebration opportunities. After contemplating all the limited experience-based options available, we decided on a 4-day trip to Charleston, which had been on my wish list for a while. I am happy to report that Charleston did not disappoint, even according to Blowfish, who is critical about, things in general.
I don’t intend to structure this post as a travel guide as I am sure you can find all the information/recommendations you will need when planning a trip based on your own likes/dislikes. Instead, what I intend to share is our observations, experiences, and of course some photos and stories behind the photos.
What I have come to realization after a long-term relationship is that to make a relationship work, being able to “tolerate” each other’s distinctive tastes is a key skill to have! When we can’t agree on something, rather than choosing his OVER mine, we gradually learned to “incorporate” his AND mine, assuming they are “incorporable” in some way. Sometimes it is a small hassle (e.g. having two giant bottles of orange juice in a small fridge – one with no pulp and one with lots of pulp), while sometimes it can be a happy surprise (e.g. why this Charleston trip was split in two parts as you will see below).
Day 1-2 – Middleton Place
Middleton Place is a plantation about 15 miles northwest of Charleston and it is home to the oldest landscaped gardens in America. Beyond the blooming camellias and meticulously designed gardens, this place also carried rich stories of the Middleton family as well as the enslaved people there. While many travelers to Charleston pick it as a day trip destination, Blowfish (as an ex-landscape architect) was really vocal about spending two nights at the Inn at Middleton Place, as he declared he was “mesmerized by the contrasting modern design” and also that he surprisingly discovered it was the brainchild of his grad school professor.
The courtyard at the Inn
I, though a layman in architecture, loved this place. The modern design was indeed a stark contrast to more than 200 years of history of the plantation, yet it blends in seamlessly. Inside the room at the Inn, the floor to ceiling windows with wood paneling is definitely something I dream of (in my 550 sqf apartment). The only “complaint” I had was the good-looking-but-by-no-means-comfy furniture. “It is an architect thing”, Blowfish explained to me.
While I thoroughly enjoyed myself and felt so relaxed at the Inn (which explained the lack of photos), I wondered how come this place never came on my radar during my research. Bit by bit, I figured out why. Wherever we went on the property, the age group we were in was about 30 years below that of the majority of the remaining visitors, although I have to say that discovery was quite consistent with Blowfish’s track record - he has always been drawn to places that were just “a tad ahead of his time”. Don’t get me wrong here though - I was not bothered by it. It was such a nice change of scene from the hustle and bustle of New York and the fact that our fellow travelers took their time to greet, smile and listen was something I missed dearly from my previous life in the south.
However, after four meals from the one and only restaurant (since we did not rent a car), we both felt that it was probably time to move on to the second leg of the trip, downtown Charleston.
Day 3-4 – Downtown Charleston
As you may have guessed it, the second (more light-hearted) leg was Blowfish’s compromise to me - charming little hotels, a variety of food, and tons of photogenic places. During our 2-day stay, our favorite thing to do was walking around the residential neighborhoods in the southern part of Charleston. I started out taking photos of every single beautiful southern-style house but gave up pretty quickly since at that speed, it would have been impossible for us to get anywhere.
The veranda at the hotel
The night view of the hotel
For those photo bugs, Charleston is full of hidden and unhidden gems - the colorful pastel facades, the Rainbow Row, the little alleys, the oak trees. Recognizing that, I decided to be a bit “selfish” this time and have some photos taken for myself. After spotting a little alley, I asked Blowfish to snap a pic of me, without knowing this little request almost evolved into a breaking point of this trip…
I quickly got the camera settings ready, gave my instructions and ran to the spot. All he needed to do was to make sure I was in focus and then press the shutter.
“Gorgeous!” Blowfish said in high spirit.
I quickly ran back to the camera and noted a guy in the frame behind me in super sharp focus. “Honey, one more please? There is a dude behind me in the photo.” I requested and ran back to that spot.
“Smile… Beautiful!” Having learned the lesson, Blowfish checked the camera and said, “No dude this time. Good to go.”
“Hmm…wait, no more dude but the tree behind me is in focus this time.” I protested, and ran back to the spot again… (Check out the photo below as evidence)
Portrait of me by Blowfish
Let me tell you - this “checking camera and running back to the spot because I was always blurry” thing went on for another four rounds, until I finally realized that I would leave Charleston without a decent photo while Blowfish declared he would never take any more photos since I was so hard to please…
Portrait of Blowfish by me to make sure the camera was not “broken”
You can imagine the next awkward twenty minutes when an unhappy couple walked separately in this beautiful town, both wondering how 10 years flew by like this! Long story short, we reconciled eventually and still managed to come back to New York, as a couple.
Just in case you are still curious - we had another conversation after that awkward twenty minutes and came up with three (not two) key takeaways which are here to stay for the next decade: 1) we would celebrate key anniversaries; 2) experience-based celebration is still preferred to gift-based celebration; and 3) we would seriously consider hiring a local photographer next time.
Lastly, to prove that we indeed reconciled, let me share one more photo that Blowfish took for me - just don’t zoom in.
